Overcoming anxiety

by Charlotte Fantelli

Run, run, run....

For years I ran away and the faster and further I ran, the  more difficult the challenges became.

Are you always avoiding that which makes you anxious?

Ask yourself this: What is worse - living a life in the prison my anxiety creates? Or the thing I am fearful of actually happening, but getting to live a normal life?

For me change came when I realised that I was more scared of dying without having lived, than I was scared of living.

I had got to a stage where my original fears were nothing in comparison to the fear of the darkness I had created in order to avoid them.

Anais Nin writes: And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.

What are you afraid of? Failure? Social gatherings? Getting hurt? Death? Whatever it is you are afraid of let me assure you there is nothing more scary than living your life a prisoner of fear. No failure, ridicule, hurt, even death, comes close to the sadness of a life half lived. 

Anxiety disorders lie to us. Our fear tells us 'I keep you safe', 'Without me you would be - sick/ridiculed/hurt....' 'I create control in your life'

The reality behind these lies is this: Fear, when it is allowed to take over destroys us and does not protect us. When we give fear control we ourselves become helpless.

Next time your anxiety tells you to 'run' or 'hide' ask yourself who is in control, you? or your anxiety?

And the way to redress the balance? To coin a phrase: Feel the fear... And do it anyway.

It is not easy but believe me, the more you do it and realise that the world does not fall apart, bit by bit the anxiety will.

It may feel insurmountable; stronger and more powerful than ourselves, but just as a powerful horse, anxiety can be harnessed and tamed.

Every one of us can learn how to ride x

Comments

Great blog Charlotte :) Anxiety is horrible.

Thanks for the comment - yes it's awful isn't it!

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I have been running too long, thankyou for making me see that maybe I might be able to stand and fight

So glad you feel inspired to do that, truly my best wishes are with you

Hi Charlotte. Three more absolutely amazing blogs -- I'm overwhelmed!

I wanted to share with you that my greatest source of anxiety is suicide -- having made an attempt 8 years ago.

I spent 5 months in a state of compulsion to kill myself three years ago and the NHS would not help at all - no home treatment, no admission, and only eventually a change of medication. This was because I had "no intent" and only compulsions.

But since that new medication I have only once felt suicidal in 3 years -- when my mum's breast cancer tests were due and I was wandering in a daze round a nearby town -- not an entirely unusual time to have suicidal ideation -- and now I know how quickly the NHS responded to the situation I no longer fear suicide anything like as badly.

I also know that locally I was escalated to the "red team" immediately until I was better, then downgraded again. This is somebody whom the NHS hope to discharge to his GP within months!

You are such an inspiration and I hope my little story will also inspire others.

It's a privilege to know, work and blog for you.  Take care.

Ian

Thank you so much Ian, and thank you for sharing your story, your blogs are fantastic and I know they are a massive encouragement. 

How about helping the brain mend and grow stronger as suggested by authors like Restak ? The power lays within to increase serotonin production with a simple soft touch, music, or smelling. Claudie Gordon-Pomares from MultiSensorytherapy.cor
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Thank you :)

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I love love love this blog, this is one of my coping strategies reading this blog and afew of the others your posted in my most difficult times and situations in my life and it gives the strength to be able to cope and do it xx

Thank you so much for saying so, I am so glad it has helped :)

Thank you, this is a great article. My anxiety has got so bad that I've had to take time off work to deal with it. So i'm in the house on my own with my anxiety...not great but at least no pressure and I can have panic attacks without having to hide. That's a relief. I completely agree, its like a spider web..anxiety creates a pretend safety net but it actually traps you. Did you read any particular books on anxiety? Look forward to your next article :)
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