Parental expectations can cause anxiety in students
By Catherine Walker
It is said that parents measure the success of their children by their academic achievements. However, a 
new study finds that this is harmful as students feel anxious over a perceived failure to perform up to their parents expectations. This in turn can damage self-esteem and also make it more difficult to adjust to school.
An example of this is that ‘Mum and Dad will be furious over my A level results and my failure to secure a place in a top university’.
A new study by the University of Central Florida has found that a student’s anxieties are often based on exaggerated perceptions of what their parents expect.
Many parents and students have different perceptions of what the parents’ expectations really are, says UCF psychologist Kimberly Renk. Students are often trying to meet goals that are far tougher than the ideals that their parents have in mind.
The study involved surveys of 174 students and 230 of their parents. It is published in the Journal of Youth and Adolescence, currently online only but is scheduled for the September edition.
This summer Renk published the findings of a separate study in the Journal of Family issues which is among the first to examine how parenting styles remain a strong influence on the way in which students adjust to college and university.
Students reported making an easier transition to college if they have at least one parent who parenting style combines warmth, a demanding nature and democracy. This has also been found to be the best combination for young children.
Renk directs UCF’s Understand Children and Families Laboratory which aims to better the lives of children and families through research, community service and clinical work. Renk is also a mother herself.
She said parents’ influences on college students may be growing at a time when mobile phones and other technology make it easier for students to stay in touch and rely on their parents.
‘Many people still assume that parenting ends when a child turns 18, but in our culture today, there is a longer extension of adolescence’ Renk said. ‘Adulthood is starting later.’
Renk and Allison Kanter Agliata started their study of parental expectations by surveying 174 students. They then collected 138 surveys from mothers and 92 fathers with the students permission. Questions centred on perceptions of personal maturity, academic achievement and dating. They were also questioned on how well students and parents thought they communicate with each other.
It was found that while most students were meeting or even exceeding their parents’ expectations, many still thought that they were falling short. These students reported lower self-esteem and more trouble adjusting to college life.
Renk recommends, as a result of her findings, that schools and universities should teach assertive communication skills to both parents and students. This will help them to avoid unnecessary stress about expectations.
In her second study, Renk and Cliff McKinney found that students who believe that they have at least one authoritative parent adjust better to college than students whose parenting styles are too authoritarian, permissive or neglectful. Authoritative parenting combines warmth, a demanding nature and democracy.
Parents who feel concerned that they have been too permissive or too authoritarian have not left it too late to change, Renk said. She feels that it takes time for parents to change their styles and they should not give up if they sometimes fail.
‘Everything is not lost if you are the parent of a student and trying to do a better job. If you are open and ready to listen to what they have to say, that will help you build a stronger relationship’ Renk concluded.
Source: University of Central Florida.
